Discovering YOU: Unveiling Your True Self

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” —Ralph Waldo Emerson

It’s more common than you think. Many individuals go through life without ever realising who they really are, living an illusion of purpose and fulfilment. Few are lucky enough to eventually become aware of their true self and passions. As a late-bloomer myself, I can now say that I wish I had discovered my “false-self” earlier in life. Knowing, owning, and loving yourself can be the most rewarding achievements in life. In short, I thought it was important to share some methods and thought processes that really helped me in discovering my true identity.

1. Let Go of the Past in a Healthy Manner

It’s a long process, and yes, easier said than done. The first step is to make sense of your past. Revisit both the good memories and the less pleasant ones. Understanding how your upbringing and family dynamics shaped you is crucial. Acknowledge any trauma and process it with time—trauma can silently follow you unless it's addressed. Overcoming your past will allow you to focus on your present and future, paving the way for reconstructing your identity.

2. Therapy

Psychotherapy, psychoanalysis, and even hypnosis can be valuable tools. If you feel overwhelmed or stuck, a therapist can help you navigate your journey. They guide you through your life story, helping you release emotional baggage and make space for your true self. The process may take months or even years, but the self-discovery is absolutely worth the effort.

3. Journaling

Journaling is a powerful tool that allows you to reflect and make sense of your experiences and emotions. Writing can be done anytime, anywhere. I prefer to journal in the morning and at night. Consistency is key, so even if you journal once a week, it helps to keep the momentum going. You’ll start to see patterns in your thoughts and feelings, and eventually, you’ll uncover deeper truths about yourself. Gratitude journaling can also shift your focus towards the positives in life.

4. Become Your Own Research Project

Think of yourself as a research project. Just as you would gather data for a school assignment or business proposal, do the same for yourself. Create sections about who you are, what you’re passionate about, and what adjectives best describe you. Explore your strengths, weaknesses, likes, dislikes, and hobbies. It’s essential to distinguish between “being” and “doing”—who you are versus what you do. Dive into your creative, intellectual, physical, and emotional aspects to balance out your different facets.

5. Ditch the Inner Critic

We all have an inner critic, often made up of external voices—family, friends, society—telling us who we should be. These negative and limiting thoughts can hold you back. Identify them, challenge them, and slowly replace them with positive, empowering beliefs. Over time, you’ll build the confidence to own your identity and ignore the judgments of others.

6. Assess Your Relationships

When we live for others rather than ourselves, we lose touch with who we truly are. Start by surrounding yourself with genuine, supportive people who encourage your growth. Ask for feedback from those who matter, but don’t let others’ opinions define you. It’s essential to express your true self, even if it takes time for those around you to adjust.

7. Educate Yourself

Knowledge is power, and the more you learn about identity, self-actualization, and personal growth, the more tools you’ll have for self-discovery. Books, documentaries, articles, and videos can all contribute to your journey. Don't forget, therapy and coaching are also forms of education, guiding you towards a better understanding of yourself.

8. Be Quiet

Silence is a rare gift in our fast-paced world. Carve out time each day to be still, unplug, and connect with yourself. Meditation, even for just a few minutes, can help calm your mind and tune out the external noise. This practice can foster introspection and a stronger sense of inner peace.

9. Simply Love YOU

Learning to love yourself is crucial. You are deserving of the same love and care you give to others. Pamper yourself, be grateful for your accomplishments, and treat yourself with kindness. Love, both from others and from within, helps you grow into the best version of yourself.

10. Find Yourself through Passion

For me, travel has been a powerful way to discover my true self. It provides perspective and insight into my place in the world. However, there are many other avenues to explore your passions: yoga, nature walks, art, sports, spending time with animals, and more. Passion brings joy and allows your authentic self to shine.

Self-discovery is an ongoing process, and every stage of life brings new lessons and insights. Becoming aware of your false-self and honouring your true identity is an empowering experience. You deserve this journey of self-discovery—it’s an exciting path that will continually reveal more of who you are.

Sarah the Digital GypSea

United Kingdom, June 2020